I feel good – hope you are feeling the same

I spend a lot of time thinking about myself.  I am now a single woman.  I still live in the family home with my two grown children who are just really starting their careers and haven’t really got a handle on their lives so they are taking their time making a decision as to where they are going.

Me?  I’ve already been there – I’m not ready for retirement and I am not looking at old age but I have to consider all my options.  I am happy in my life.  Yes happy.   I am separated and felt it long before he left.  Now I am alone and I’m not lonely.  So why is it necessary for me to start looking at new things in my life?  People want me to find someone else.  What the hell for?  The last one was not the love of my life but I trusted him more than anyone else and he was the most honest person I would have ever thought there could me and he turned out to be a rat.  So no, no man in my life is ever going to have such an effect on me again.  PLUS I said he was not the love of my life and while I am a true romantic and even write romance novels for myself I don’t believe this is one man out there who could tolerate or put up with me as I am today.

Hopefully my kids will one day meet someone, fall in love, get married and have kids (not necessarily in that order) and I truly want to be around for that.  Having said that I am considering going to Weight Watchers again (I went 15 years ago and lost a lot of weight).  I sit around all the time considering my weight and my mother checks me out and every now and again tells me “you shouldn’t eat that” and I shouldn’t let that worry me.  I should do what I want to do and then I think of all the things I would really like to do and sometimes it deals with clothes.  I love clothes.  I love the look of them and I love to wear them but they don’t like me in the form that I am in now.

I don’t want to be skinny, I will never be skinny but I want to be comfortable in my own skin and I realised only this week that I am not.  I need a purpose.  It doesn’t mean I will be attractive to the opposite sex or that I will be a super model but it does mean that I have something to strive for and certainly want to start looking after myself and that includes eating properly.  I have checked on line and shall certainly be making a phone call or two to learn a little more.  I’m not great in groups and personally don’t like new things but I don’t think that this will honestly keep me from doing something I should be doing right now. 

So?  It’s all about me!!  I need to do what’s right for me and frankly if I don’t do it now I am never going to do it.  I have the money and the means to put myself first for a change and I am looking for that new challenge in a really good place in my life. I am my own boss and I need purpose and this challenge will send me in one direction rather than the fifteen I keep thinking about.  

This is a start of things to come whether good or bad but it’s a start and I have to start somewhere.  Wish me luck!

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About daysnet

I am having the best time of my life. I'm 50 plus, divorced, two grown children and just the opportunity to have a life after so many years of scrimping and saving is well worth the time it took to get here. I have a fantastic family with great family values and spending time alone is certainly something I enjoy which a lot of people find difficult to handle. I was born and raised in Melbourne, Victoria, Australia and cannot imagine living anywhere else. Strangely I don't like to travel and have no plans to do that in the future - I say strangely because so many people can't understand this, wanting to travel and experience other cultures - not on my agenda. What do I want to do? I have my new house and am enjoying making it my own but now I am looking for the right job for me after 10 years of being "just a receptionist". I don't want to be "JUST" anything anymore. I would like a job that helps me grow personally, something that encourages me to learn but also where I can be creative and people appreciate me. I want, I want, I want but really I need to know that I am comfortable in my own skin and my life means something to me. My motto is ... "People may forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel" I've had many people who I can't even remember their names tell me that I made them feel good and for that I am truly grateful. I have become an avid reader of Rhonda Byrne's 'THE SECRET', "THE POWER" & now 'THE MAGIC". Whether you believe or think it's a load of @#$!@ - I do know that it works for me and my life and I am all the better for it. You can't go wrong when you just learn to say "thank you".
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2 Responses to I feel good – hope you are feeling the same

  1. Golly !! Kudos to you ! 😀 ….
    ……..cheers cheers cheers …..
    ………. Inspiring as well as So so beautiful
    …………….ahhhh..Awesomeness …. Ur Reclaiming your space and your power !

  2. Wanted to share and say thank you

    Your words and journey are the priceless tangible example of the courage , being a trailblazer , being a ray of inspiration , encouragement , and shining that bringing those darkened spaces back to the light.. It can be done

    Been a long time , with the thought that I am powerless
    And just starting baby crawl to reclaiming stepping back into the power
    I always has.

    If you don’t like where you are- change it…..you are not a TREE !

    Reading This was a “oh my god , what ? Really ? Yes …uuuhhh wow
    Moment …..really hit home … Need to let it sink in deep .

    Loving Regards n gratitude.
    D

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