My husband and I have been separated for 9 months – it’s gone fast and frankly haven’t missed him at all. Sure you think about things but nothing to say that I’d ever want him back.
BUT! Today I got a phone call from his “Auntie” (his deceased mother’s best friend) and I answered the phone, she said my name and then burst into tears.
One of the reasons I don’t tell people I’m separated is because I don’t want them saying “I’m sorry” and feeling that the world has come to an end for me. Because my life is just beginning again and I’m thoroughly enjoying the freedom of not having to be on guard at all times any more.
So what do you say to the extended family when they ring. “Don’t you dare worry about me, I’m fantastic!” That’s exactly what I said. I told her that we were going in two different directions, that we were comfortable with our lives but obviously he wasn’t and that he wasn’t a great dad or husband but he was and still is a very good provider.
I have my own feelings about the guy but hey, it takes two to make a marriage and I “settled” so I am just as much to blame. No blame is not the right word. We grew up and grew apart. That’s all.
The funniest thing was that Auntie Pitsa asked “IF? If he was to come back….” and my answer was plain and simple. I’d let him in, let him sleep in the spare room as it still technically partly his house and then I’d tell him I’m on my way out, you look after the dog.
There is just no way I would take him back. He disappointed me in ways I couldn’t imagine but I’d never leave him homeless.
So I think that phone call showed me that I have come out of this quite well and good luck to him in his new life with his new lady and her kids – I just hope he doesn’t try and control them as he did my kids and me, otherwise he will be on my doorstep wanting a room sooner than later.